Talk To Me
by ps9906
Summary: It's September and Trixie has her meltdown which leads her to seek help. Written for those who asked for more of the story. Precedes Meltdown.


Disclaimer: I do not own Trixie Belden or the Bob-Whites. No profit is being made from their use.

**Talk To Me**

The warm September morning held little appeal for fifteen-year-old Trixie Belden. Her oldest brother, Brian, and her boyfriend, Jim, were spending their first weekends away at college. Trixie missed them desperately, especially Jim. Much to her amazement, her parents had given their consent when she and Jim had made the move from friends to dating. She didn't even mind the occasional teasing that she received from Dan and Mart. Only the stern glares from her big brother, Brian, made her flush now. Trixie sighed. She knew Brian was opposed to her dating anyone, even Jim.

With all her chores done, Trixie decided to take a walk. Sitting alone, missing Jim, wasn't going to make him come home any sooner. Trixie frowned. Neither was imagining all the pretty college girls running loose on campus. Stubbornly pushing that thought aside, she walked deliberately to the clubhouse. The Bob-Whites had made good use of it this summer. With seven rambunctious teenagers always in and out, it could use a good cleaning. _Great,_ she thought, _now I'm cleaning for entertainment._

Trixie quickly became absorbed in her task. Most of the larger equipment had been stowed away by the boys before Jim and Brian left for college. As she was putting the last of their summer gear away, she spied the scrapbook that Honey had made of their adventures. The book seemed to beckon to Trixie. She couldn't resist the urge to go down memory lane one more time. So engrossed in her memories, she didn't hear Dan slip quietly in behind her. With a mischievous grin, he grabbed her shoulders and gave her a playful shove.

"No!" Trixie shrieked and turned wildly on Dan. Her arms flailed at him before she could stop herself. Only half-realizing it was Dan, she continued her defensive response.

"Trixie, Trixie," Dan shouted, startled by her reaction, "it's me, Dan."

Finally, Dan's voice broke into the fog surrounding Trixie. She burst into tears and sank back down into the chair.

"Trixie?" Dan said with concern. "What happened just then?"

"I'm just still a little jumpy," Trixie explained through her sniffles. "I didn't expect anyone here this morning."

"It's okay, Freckles." Dan sat down beside her and tentatively put his arm around her. He could remember Jim saying that Trixie sometimes pulled back if he showed too much affection. The last thing he wanted to do was to scare her anymore. "I'm sorry for sneaking up on you."

"It's okay." Trixie shook his arm off and stood. "You want to help me clean?"

"Sure," Dan agreed with a sigh. He realized she still pushed the attack out of her mind and kept pretending that everything was fine. For the most part, she was successful in fooling her friends. Only Jim and Dan could see the hidden pain, having experienced it for themselves.

* * *

_Jim and Dan had discussed that very issue before Jim left for college. Waiting at the lake for the other Bob-Whites to join them, their conversation centered around Trixie._

_"You do know that Trixie's not as recovered as she seems," Jim remarked._

_"Yeah," agreed Dan, "she's good at pretending."_

_Both guys sat on the dock, gazing unseeingly at the lake._

_"I wish I wasn't going off to college," Jim sighed regretfully. "I worry about what else could happen while I'm away."_

_"You know, Jim," Dan said with a rueful smile, "it's not like Trixie didn't get in trouble while you were here."_

_"Tell me about it," Jim laughed. Then he turned serious. "Keep an eye on her, Dan." Jim chuckled a little. "Just don't let her know that I asked you."_

_"Heavens know," Dan agreed in mock concern. Quoting Trixie, he added, "Gleeps! Can't I do anything without you guys hovering over me?"_

_"She is kind of sensitive about that," Jim remarked with a grin._

_They stopped talking as they heard the sound of female giggles approaching. Dan watched as Jim greeted Trixie and the others. He would try to keep his promise to Jim, but knowing her, it wouldn't be easy._

* * *

Trixie wouldn't talk to Dan about the incident anymore, saying she wanted to forget it. Now, he had never seen her so focused on school work or even her chores. In fact, she kept the remaining four Bob-Whites so busy even Di and Honey began to grow weary

"Stop, Trixie," Honey pleaded one day at lunch period. "No more plans."

"Yeah," agreed Di, "let's just have a sleepover and relax. No hikes, no riding, no cookouts, no visiting the elderly."

"I guess," Trixie said slowly. "I've just been on a roll lately."

"Well, next weekend Brian and Jim are coming home," Honey reminded her. "You'll have that to look forward to."

Trixie missed Jim, that much was obvious to everyone who knew her. Close enough that they could visit most weekends, the boys had delayed their first visit home at their parents' insistence. "You need to get adjusted to college life," they said. Now, the mandated one month period was almost over. During this time, Jim and Trixie stayed in touch by phone and email. Neither was as satisfying as seeing each other.

After talking with Di and Honey, Trixie eased up in her role of self-imposed activities director. She even relished the idea of an evening alone. Mr. and Mrs. Belden were taking Bobby and the Lynch twins out for ice cream. Usually chaperoned by four set of curious eyes whenever he visited her, Mart used the unexpected time to visit Diana.

Trixie settled on the couch with a book she had to read for English class, the cordless phone nearby. She was grateful that Jim had also read it. He had given her some insights that could use in her report. As Trixie read the story, she was appalled to discover that the young heroine was being stalked. Fear gripped her as her mind flashed back to the scene in late April. In her own home. She could still see Ben and hear his voice. Her skin began to crawl. It seemed like it was happening all over. She had been studying, like now, when Ben had entered the same room. Terrified, Trixie rushed to check the locks on the doors.

Mart appeared in the kitchen doorway much like Ben had. When he grabbed Trixie's arms to steady her, the similarities overlapped. She didn't see Mart. She only saw Ben. Screaming and crying, she violently fought him. When he gripped her arms tightly, she panicked.

"No! No! No!" she screamed, pulling away from him.

Her stunned parents watched as she fled to the small downstairs bathroom. A teary-eyed Mart looked helplessly back at them.

"Let me talk to her," Mrs. Belden suggested, blinking back tears of her own. Mr. Belden quietly agreed as he put a protective arm around Bobby while Mart fled to his room to call Brian.

"Oh, god, Brian," Mart sobbed, "it's bad."

"Mart, what is it?" Brian's voice loud with concern.

"It's Trixie."

"Trixie," Brian repeated. "What's the matter with Trixie?"

By now Brian's words had caught Jim's full attention. Jumping to Brian's side, Jim looked at him with trepidation.

"She just freaked out. She was screaming and crying, trying to hit me. I think she thought I was Ben."

"Where is Trixie now?" Brian asked through clenched teeth.

"She's with Moms, at least, I think she is. She locked herself in the bathroom."

"Just like before," Brian groaned, once again furious with Ben Riker.

"What do I do, Brian? She scared Bobby to death." All of the Belden siblings looked to Brian for answers to serious problems.

"I wish I knew," said Brian sadly.

"What's going on?" Jim asked impatiently, unable to keep silent any longer.

Brian held up his hand to still Jim. "Jim and I will be home this weekend. Just let Trixie know we love her. Try to calm Bobby while you're at it. We'll call back later, okay."

"Okay, Brian," Mart said and hung up the phone.

When Brian turned off his phone, Jim demanded an answer. "What's going on with Trixie?"

"She's had… or having some kind of flashback," Brian explained, the extreme worry showing in his eyes. "Mart's frantic and Moms is trying to calm her down."

"Oh, god," Jim moaned softly, "this is all my fault. I should have insisted she talk to someone."

"Jim, this isn't your fault," Brian snorted in disbelief. "It's that creep Ben Riker's fault."

"But I knew she was having problems. She wouldn't talk about them, not even to me."

"Hell, Jim, we all knew Trixie was having problems. She's just been in such a state of denial that no one could get through to her."

"Damn," Jim slammed his fist on his desk, "I should have just killed Ben Riker."

"As much as I would like to agree with you, I'm sure Trixie is glad you didn't," Brian said wryly.

"You know, as much danger as Trixie has encountered, I can't believe that her own home was the place she was attacked," Jim said shaking his head. "I don't know how she held it together this long."

"We'll call later," Brian suggested. "If we can't talk to her, Mart can tell us what's going on."

Both young men sat in silent worry, all thoughts focused on Trixie.

**Back at Crabapple Farm….**

Trixie was lying quietly on her bed, still sniffling from her traumatic evening, when Mrs. Belden knocked on her door.

"Come in," Trixie called wearily. She had hoped everyone would leave her alone for the rest of the night.

"How are you feeling, dear?" Mrs. Belden asked as she sat down on the bed beside her.

"I'm okay," she answered in a quiet voice, embarrassment flushing her cheeks. "I'm really sorry about scaring Bobby."

"Oh, Trixie," her mom said and pulled Trixie into her arms, "you have nothing to be sorry about. You've got to remember that."

"I'm trying, Moms. I really am, but I don't know if I can do this anymore."

"Sometimes, it's not something you can do all alone."

"What do you mean?" Trixie asked warily.

"Your father and I think you need to speak with a professional," Mrs. Belden explained softly.

"A shrink!" Trixie cried in horror. "Oh no, Moms, everyone will think I'm crazy."

"No one has to know," her mother insisted. "It's for the best, Trixie."

"I guess I don't have a choice, do I?" Noticing her mom's hesitation, she added, "What is it now?"

"Mart called Brian and Jim. He was really scared too."

Trixie buried her face in her pillow. "Now Brian and Jim are going to get over protective."

"Is that such a bad thing?" her mother smiled.

"I just don't want them hovering over me like I'm going to flip out any minute. It was bad enough already."

"Well, I'm sure Brian and Jim will call back, probably tonight," Mrs. Belden informed her. "It might be for the best if you tell them about seeing someone. They won't worry so much and they can keep a secret, but it's up to you."

"I'll think about it," Trixie promised, but she wasn't sure she would have the courage to tell them. After her mother left, she pondered just what she had told her. What would her friends say?

Later, when Mart pecked on her door with the cordless phone in hand, Trixie groaned inwardly.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah," she nodded. Looking at the phone, she asked, "Is that for me?"

"It's Brian."

"Thanks, Mart," she smiled and shut the door behind him. "Hi, Brian."

"Hey, Trixie," Brian said softly. "I hear you had a bad night."

"I'm alright, Brian, really I am."

"I just worry about you, Trix. We all do."

"I know," Trixie sighed. "I'm sorry about that. I hate that it's bothering everyone."

"It's no bother, Sis, and it's not your fault, nothing to be sorry for." Brian hated the fact that she felt guilty and he hated being so far away.

"I don't know, Brian, sometimes I feel…I don't know how I feel," Trixie blinked back tears of helplessness and frustration.

"It's okay, Trixie," Brian said soothingly, "you must be overwhelmed after tonight."

"That's an understatement," she laughed through her tears. In a serious voice, she added, "I'm going to talk to someone, a therapist or counselor."

"I think that's a good idea," Brian agreed, relieved by her decision.

"Could you keep that a secret for a while?" Trixie asked. "I'm not ready for everyone to know."

"Sure. Uh, Trix, Jim's here. He'd like to talk to you."

"I'd like to talk to him, too. I want to tell him about tonight."

"Okay, I love you, Sis."

"You too, Brian," she answered back.

"Hey, Shamus." Jim spoke tenderly, trying to keep his emotions under control.

Even so, Trixie heard the warmth in his voice, ridding her of the awkwardness she feared. "Hi, Jim."

"Are you okay?" he asked, concern lacing his voice.

"No, but I will be," her voice so low that Jim could barely hear her.

"Trix…"

"I always feel better after talking to you," she continued quickly. Worrying Jim made her feel sick to her stomach, but she needed to be truthful with someone. He made her feel safe and protected, that need overpowering her desire to protect him.

"Oh, sweetie, I can talk all night if you want to," Jim sighed in relief. "Heck, I'll come home right now if it helps."

"No, don't do that, just talk with me. I really need to just talk, okay?"

"You can tell me everything and anything." Jim's heart began to pound as his gut tightened. Hearing the details straight from Trixie's lips would not be easy.

"I'm going to talk to a therapist. Moms insisted," she admitted.

"I think that's a good idea, but you know you can always count on me."

The softness of Jim's voice made Trixie's heart melt. She knew he meant every word. "I know," she choked out, her voice a little tremulous. "I don't know what I would do without you right now."

"That's something you won't ever have to worry about," he assured her. "I love you, Trix, always."

"I love you, too, Jim, always."

"Now talk to me," he implored her. "I've got all night."

* * *

This is self-edited so overlook or let me know of any mistakes you find. Thanks.


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